The Hassle With Making Mom Friends

Oh crap. I only have one mom friend.

Several weeks ago, I was sitting simply reflecting on my life and the friends I’ve had throughout the years and I started to think,

“Oh wow. What happened to so and so…? Oh crap. I only have one mom friend. I think. Or maybe two at the most.”

Which would be fine if they lived in the same state as me.
So I started to realize that some people just move on, and others have a hard time moving on or letting go. Which one am I? And I the kind to hold on to bits of memories of friendships that once existed or am I one to just finally go “out there” and make some new friends? But like they all say, making mom friends is not that easy. Either they live too far or sometimes you just don’t click. I’ve been down that road before. And do I really have the time and energy to invest in a new friendship right now? Do I just walk up to a mom at the grocery store and say, “Hey, wanna be friends and have play dates…and stuff?” Awkward a bit. Isn’t it?

the hassle with

After posting about this on my Instagram, turns out that I was not alone.  They suggested:
“Go to a mom meet-up” or “go to the library” or “what about your church?”

I’ve done all of the above.
There was a time after I had my first baby when I was actively or maybe even desperately on “the search” for new mom friends. But after having my second baby I now realize that it will happen eventually and to not kill myself trying to make friends by forcing it upon myself. Tried that once and let’s just say it didn’t end well. I also don’t have much energy to even entertain the idea of making friends, let alone go anywhere by myself, hence, the bathroom, without:
A) a newborn crying in the background

B) a toddler following me to the bathroom.
But all jokes aside, sometimes it’s hard to accept our new circumstances. After losing a few friends years ago, I would find myself wondering if I had done something wrong but I realized that this is just life.

People get married. People have babies. People move away. People move on. Sometimes you just don’t have anything in common anymore, so the friendship just vanishes little by little. But that’s the beauty of friendship. You never know what’s ahead.

I’m learning what true friendship is and I realize that some friends were never really my friends to begin with, and I’m also realizing that I was not always a good friend myself. Matter of fact, I was probably a crappy friend. We like to point the finger, but now that I’m older and wiser (I think), I can look back and admit that.

A true friend, no matter what, knows and understands what is important to you and would stick by you through those significant moments in your life. A true friend also knows when to give you your space, but still be around at the same time. The true friend knows how to be there for you even when you don’t think you need them there. And when you become a mom, having a mom friend takes “a whole nother” meaning. You can’t ask for too much or expect too much from them. Just someone you can meet up with at the park with the kids, meet up for coffee for some “mommy time” and grown up chit-chat, or go for a morning walk to lose that baby weight.


So whenever my new mom friends will make their appearance in my life, I think I will be a pretty darn good friend—better than I ever was. But for now, I’m content with the ones I have, even if they live hundreds of miles away.


Also published on HUFFPOST  Here

Continue Reading

You Make Motherhood Look So Easy!

Is motherhood as scary as it sounds? For the past couple of weeks, since giving birth to my second baby, I’ve gotten comments such as, “You Make Motherhood Look So Easy!” My first thought was, “What the heck does that even mean?” I received this comment from a mom and from a friend who doesn’t have children yet. I was so confused, so I asked my husband if I should be offended or flattered.Then I decided to ask for clarification from one of the persons who told me this—the one without children yet.  She further explained that as someone without […]

Continue Reading

Leave My Body Alone…Curves and All

It can be very difficult for some women to get back in shape after baby. We all have different body types, so for some it may happen in a month and others it may take a year or even longer. I’m still not cleared to exercise, so today I started with some light stretching, as my muscles were feeling tight. My baby slept peacefully in the solly wrap against mommy’s chest. My advice to women postpartum is, I believe that when you are ready, take your time and do the exercises that feel right to you and your body. There […]

Continue Reading

The Birth Story

  Birth Story of J.J. On that Wednesday, my family and I did some walking in a local mall where I kept getting non ending pressure in the pelvic area. I started to lose more and more of my mucus plug and could hardly walk. Three days prior, my dr did give me a stretch but I was barely a 1 and 50% effaced, so I didn’t think it would work–neither did she. So that night around 2am, my braxton hicks contractions started to feel a bit more intense little by little. I was 38 weeks and 4 days. The […]

Continue Reading

Solly Baby Wrap Review

So today as I was busy in the kitchen, I was finally able to wear my Solly Baby Wrap and I am happy with the results. First, I watched the video below: Then I did a few tries without the baby first. The first time I placed baby in, he was way up too high, so be sure that he’s not too high or too low. Just in the right position where you can place a kiss on his forehead if you looked down. Overall, it is very comfortable and I did not feel like my muscles were in pain […]

Continue Reading

Just Received My Solly Baby Wrap “Coral”

Just received my Solly Baby Wrap and I’m excited about putting it to use soon! I chose the newest color “coral” because it’s spring/pretty much summer in AZ now. I will definitely write a longer blog post about it when I actually use it with my soon to be born baby boy! I received a 15% discount too so be sure to always look for those before purchasing. $65 to $55. I ordered it on Sunday and got it Tuesday morning. Shipping was free! I advise visiting the Solly Wrap Instagram’s page @sollybabywrap or her website. Which wrap do/did you […]

Continue Reading

Mommy Time

As a mother and a wife, I am mostly occupied throughout the day with taking care of my baby, spending time with The Hubz, and handling household responsibilities. Mothers are always busy doing something! So, any chance I get to just have one hour to myself and unwind, I jump at the opportunity! Every now and then it’s okay and important to just have some time to yourself. I had an interview downtown this morning, so after the interview I had the chance to check out Lola Coffee Bar. It was so good to just sit there and relax that […]

Continue Reading

Sometimes what we think we want so bad is not necessarily what is best for us.

I thought I wanted to have a full-time job and get my career rolling. But I’m starting to realize that maybe it isn’t what I should focus on right now. I have a beautiful 8-month old baby who needs his mama, and I should enjoy every single moment with him instead of wasting time wondering why so and so company decided not to hire me. (By the way, why do companies interview external candidates when they know that they will end up hiring an internal candidate? Stop wasting people’s time!) Before KLM came into this world, I had no idea […]

Continue Reading