Enjoy the Season You’re In

I feel like I need a change. Career wise. Why aren’t we ever content with where we are? For whatever reason, I feel like where I am now is not enough or where I truly want to be. But then I hear God whisper to me,

Enjoy the season you’re in.

My husband asked me, “What makes you happy?” “What do you truly want to do?”

Well, Write. Read. Research. Home Decor. Anything House related. 

Sometimes simple questions are more complex than they sound. I know what makes me happy, but it feels like there’s  a bridge between us that I can’t seem to cross over.

Five years ago, I saw myself as a novelist someday. Today, I don’t just see myself as a novelist  someday, because my interests have since then reached into other areas other than fiction.  More realistic goals, I suppose.

If you’re a writer then you understand how difficult it is to find a full-time job in this field or be a full-time  writer.

I’m truly learning to be patient. :: patiently waiting, hoping, and praying for the change my heart so desires.

You’re So Lucky! You Have It All Figured Out.

 Although I am currently working from home full-time /WAHM, (I’m an online writing instructor for a local university) I don’t exactly love it  and at times, it can feel very frustrating, exhausting, and stressful– and on those days, I’m just about over working from home . So, I even went to great lengths and had job interviews with a possible career change.

But then this morning  I had to make an early drive into the city and as I sat there in major traffic near downtown, I thought, “there’s no way I’m getting back out there for any 8-5 type of job. What was I thinking by wanting to “get back out there ?”

I’m sure some us have that familiar sentiment: The guilt that comes with the desire to focus on your career while also being there for your children. The guilt that comes with wanting a career. The guilt that would eventually come with putting the kids in someone else’s care while you work. The guilt of not using your degree or vice versa.  I read an article over the weekend that discussed this very topic and it really had me thinking and realizing that I’m not alone.

Yes, I would love to have my dream job or dream career, but for now, I’m grateful for what I have. I am content with where I am because I know that if the time ever came for me to “get back out there” I will miss being out on my patio in the middle of the day. I do have a job that allows me to spend as much time as I want with my kids and some moms would gladly trade places with me.

So, for now, I’d rather be a night owl who grades while everyone else sleeps. I’d rather go for morning hikes with my baby and take pretty pictures in the mornings while I sip my coffee. Sometimes we never seem satisfied with what we have. Always wanting more and forgetting the now. But today, I’m satisfied. Because many would want to trade places with me. Today, I live in the moment and appreciate the present.

To all the moms who constantly tell me,” You’re so lucky. You have it all figured out so young.”

No, I don’t. I’m just like you, still trying to figure out what it is I really want.

 

Our greatest weakness lies in giving up.

It’s a tough world out there. I have been applying for full-time jobs since October.  I have applied to hundreds of jobs and have gotten only four interviews,  three of which I was not offered a job–even when I was confident that I did fantastic.  For those of you in Higher Education/Academia, there are too many applicants and not enough positions. The competition is fierce.

I’m at the point where I’m ready to work in a different field if the last interview I had does not give me an offer.

I’m trying to stay positive, but it’s becoming difficult.

I keep trying to remind myself that those jobs were not made for me if I didn’t get them. The right one will come along  at the right time, I suppose. But,  I refuse to be an Adjunct for the rest of my life. For the time being, I am enjoying teaching only three days a week and spending time with my 7 month old baby.

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The Hubz has been very encouraging and keeps me motivated to keep applying.

If you’re in the same boat as me, don’t give up. There’s light at the end of the tunnel.  The right job will come along at the right time.  Just keep doing your part, and God will do His.

Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.

– Thomas A. Edison